Wrestlemania 28 thoughts and review

I don’t think there much need for an introduction, it’s Wrestlemania 28! Here are my thoughts.

Daniel Bryan vs Sheamus

Well, what the fuck can I say? According to reports, WWE wanted to break the record for the shortest match at Wrestlemania and guess what? THEY DIDN’T EVEN BREAK IT! The World Heavyweight Championship, the second biggest title in all of wrestling, is treated like absolute trash. No wonder you’re not getting new superstars over if the WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE is being devalued to that level. I understand that titles are props to enhance the talent that is wearing it, but they’re also a signifier for the prestige of your company and to disappoint and treat fans both in attendance and at home like shit by having this squash as the opening match? Disgusting. Now let me clarify before I continue, I have no problem with Sheamus being the champion and he’s probably overdue a run at the top, it is the manner with how things went down that pisses me off no end. Having being pushed off last year’s card Daniel Bryan and Sheamus had a lot to prove. However, whichever tool thought it’d be a good idea to book the match like this needs firing. If you listen to the crowd for the next two or three matches, all you’re getting are ‘Daniel Bryan’ and ‘yes’ chants. I really hope that someone in the back, preferably Vince McMahon, heard the chants and figured out that they’d made a fucking horrible mistake. Daniel Bryan is a heel that gets HEAT, he’s not a cool heel that sometimes gets face pops, he get’s BOO’D. Now, when that completely turns around and the live crowd couldn’t give a flying fuck about a Randy Orton match and instead chants for Daniel Bryan, something has gone amiss. I have seen some people try and put a positive spin on the match, claiming that this will advance Bryan’s storyline with AJ. Fuck that. Bryan was rapidly becoming the top heel in the entire WWE, nevermind just Smackdown, and to bury that momentum like this is just a terrible booking decision. Mark Henry and The Big Show couldn’t derail Daniel Bryan. Undertaker, HHH, Cena and The Rock kicked out of multiple finishers later in the night. Yet, Daniel Bryan goes down with one Brogue Kick? Bullshit. Another audible crowd chant, by the way.

0 stars

Winner and NEW World Heavyweight Champion: Sheamus

Randy Orton vs Kane

Right, well here we go with the proper opening match. Both men are rather methodical and slow in their wrestling style, which led to a rather lacklustre opening between the two. The crowd were seemingly still pissed with the opening …kick… and responded accordingly. It really took until the middle of the match for any sort of excitement to occur with a couple of nice back and forth moves before Kane hit a chokeslam from the second rope for a clean win. Honestly, it was definitely unexpected. I’d argue the only reason for Kane to win here is if WWE are looking to re-build him into the demonic, monsteriffic, big red machine he once was. If not and we get a re-match at Extreme Rules which Randy Orton wins, it will have been for naught. The fact that this match wasn’t Kane vs Zack Ryder still makes absolutely no sense in the world of kayfabe, is Ryder supposed to let Kane’s attacks on him slide?

**

Winner: Kane

Cody Rhodes vs Big Show for the Intercontinental Championship

Again, another slow and methodical match. Rhodes worked on the knee’s and Big Show delivered the giant chops, everything you’d expect. Towards the end of the match, Show delivered a botched mid-air spear which hit Rhodes square in the balls. That had to hurt. As I predicted, WWE gave The Big Show his Wrestlemania moment and allows Rhodes to move on to bigger and better things. Not really much more to say on this one, it was everything I expected.

**

Winner and NEW Intercontinental Champion: The Big Show

Kelly Kelly & Maria Menounos vs Beth Phoenix & Eve

We all knew it was going to be bad. It was. Sloppy execution of moves along with screams to make the ears bleed. At one point, Maria did the stink face on Eve and half of her make up ended up on Maria’s pants. It looked like she’d let a deuce drop, furthering the embarrassment of the divas. The one redeeming quality was Kelly Kelly’s flipping Lou Thesz press from the top rope. The pinfall came in the form of a ROLL UP, the divas finisher of doom! Another outstanding contest from all involved and a testament to womens wrestling everywhere.

*

Winners: Kelly Kelly and Maria Menounos

Triple H vs The Undertaker /w Shawn Michaels as special referee inside Hell in a Cell

There are two sides to my thoughts of this match, as it really had me split. On the one hand, both men told an excellent story. The emotion levels were running high and the drama unfolded almost without a hitch. Shawn Michaels played his role perfectly, portraying the tension and the conflict in his decision making. The near pinfalls had me on the edge of my seat and when Michaels delivered sweet chin music to Taker, I thought the streak had been vanquished. The brutality of the weapon shots were, perversely, nice to see as it’s not often you seen physicality of that nature in the current era. At the end, when all three men walked out together and embraced on the entrance ramp, it really did feel like the end of an era and could’ve been the end of all three of their careers. However, these were my feelings in the moment. When you take a step back and really think about the match… it’s a different story.

Sure, wrestling is sometimes purely emotion but we’re looking at a match that lasted above the 30-minute mark and no more than 15 minutes of that could have been action. There was just so much stalling. Repeated chair shots, ask him, wait, wait, no, chair shots, ask him, wait, wait, no, chair shots… it was so contrived and seemed to drag on at points. When there was actually action taking place it worked, but people really don’t pay their money to see them talk to each other for ten minutes. Also, there was absolutely no necessity for the Hell In A Cell, sure it was used as a selling point but was only used in the match a couple of times. The match seemed to play out more like a Last Man Standing match and would have actually made more sense when you consider the storyline. Anyway, if it wasn’t for the stalling, the talking and the uselessness of the cell, this match would have been near perfect. I understand the necessity for some of the spots of chatter, but the sluggishness and stalling dragged the match down for me. Still, the raw emotion, story told by all three men and the fact that the match had me engrossed means that we still witnessed a good match.

***1/2

Winner: The Undertaker

Team Teddy vs Team Johnny

For all the build this match received, nothing happened. Booker T took the brunt of the punishment before it broke down into a messy clusterfuck. Highlights? A sweet, tandem triple flip over the top rope spot was timed to perfection and Mark Henry flinging Hornswoggle out of the way like a rag doll. The Miz got the victory over Ryder after the distraction from Eve. No surprise that Lauranitis is now the GM of both Raw and Smackdown, a heel authority figure works better.

Winners: Team Johnny

* 1/2

Following the match, in what should come as a surprise to absolutely nobody, Eve turned on Zack Ryder by kicking him in the nards. I flat out don’t get it. Surely the WWE doesn’t think it’s fans are that retarded? Is anybody supposed to believe that a man would return to any woman who openly admits that they’re using him and just Etch-a-Sketch his memory clean? I would have thought that the storyline was going to lead to either Ryder finally catching on that Eve was playing him or that Ryder was actually stringing Eve along and she would get her comeuppance and we could all move on. No, that’s not the case. What’s going to happen next? Is she going to tell him on Raw that she was actually trying to fondle his junk and he’ll be like HUR HUR OK, DERRRRP. It’s just another example of terrible booking. Ryder was building so much momentum for himself. His merchandise was some of the top selling and he was getting more and more over each week. Until WWE crushed his momentum with both the Kane storyline and now this storyline by making him look like an absolute doofus, it’s quickly turning people off. HOW ARE YOU GOING TO MAKE NEW STARS WWE?

CM Punk vs Chris Jericho for the WWE Championship

The opening minutes of this contest had me worried. I think they focussed a little too much on Jericho trying to get Punk disqualified. It would have been better if they’d have followed the formula of Jericho vs Michaels at Wrestlemania 19. Just out and out action from the get go. The spots with Jericho cowering in the corner could have been placed intermittently throughout the match, not all at once. However, the pace quickly picked up and the psychology between the two was superb. It easily ended up the best match in terms of wrestling quality on the night. The top rope counter Codebreaker was amazing and Punk screaming ‘Tap you son of a bitch!’ was the emotional highlight. Not quite the clinic I was hoping for, but a good effort nonetheless.

****

Winner and STILL WWE Champion: CM Punk

Somebody in the back thought it would be a good idea to have Brodus Clay come out with a bunch of people dressed as old women with inflatable asses and dance. Honestly, whoever in the back thinks this is funny is so out of touch it’s unbelievable. Its things like this that make wrestling fans embarrassed to admit they watch.

John Cena vs The Rock

The atmosphere for the match was everything I had hoped for. My TV speakers were shaking from the thunderous response. Shame about Eminem getting aids and coming out and spewing something about John Cena being an underdog before the match. Are you serious? John Cena is the furthest away from being an underdog possible. Dumb shit got boo’d for that. Good.

As for the match, being The Rock’s first singles match in 8 years it was never going to be a technical classic but the two put on a decent match. Basic back and forth offence was utilised well before they began to bust out signature moves. It could be argued that the match was sloppy in parts and it legitimately looked like they were trying to take each other’s heads off at points.

Plenty of near falls and finishing manoeuvres before the application of back and forth submission holds. Cena’s STF has never been pretty but The Rock’s sharpshooter is horrible. Bret Hart offered to show him how to apply it correctly, Rocky should have took that advice. The ending sequence played out nicely, Cena got cocky and The Rock took advantage of the mistake and got the clean win. I said it in my predictions column but this was absolutely the wrong decision. 

***

Winner: The Rock

The full-time workhorse top name in the WWE just lost to a guy who had his second match in seven years. WWE flushed the past eight years down the toilet. Fuck you John Cena, the attitude era was better. The Rock HAD to put over John Cena because Cena is going to be there the next 5-7 years carrying the company, whereas Rocky will swan off back to Hollywood. If you’ll notice, we didn’t have a handshake, we didn’t have a ‘you’re better’ type deal. That sets up the potential for a re-match. The Rock is booked for Raw tonight and something is DEFINITELY going down. Cena’s character could go a variety of ways. He could get depressed, turn manically enraged and start destroying people or just accept it and continue being the happy go lucky Cena we all know.  It could of course lead to the long time coming Cena heel turn, but I’m not getting my hopes up. If we are in fact heading for the rumoured trilogy of matches between the two, it's a little nightmarish at this point and the fact that we’ll have to endure another year of playground insults between the two is just too much to fathom.

To sum up, Wrestlemania 28 was incredibly mediocre. For an event that had so much potential it was let down by some piss poor booking decisions and it’s a god damn shame. WWE need a serious reshuffle in the creative department as some of the decisions leading up to and including Wrestlemania 28 have been nothing short of retarded.

If I was to grade it, I'd give it a D+ or a C-.

Thank’s for reading

What were your thoughts on Wrestlemania?

Wrestlemania 28 predictions

It has become cliché throughout the years but Wrestlemania really is the ‘grandaddy of them all.’ There’s nothing quite like it and as a wrestling fan, it’s the one night you just have to mark out during the live broadcast. The 28^th edition has an absolutely stacked card and as far as match quality it has the potential to be one of the best ever.

Lets have a look.

Team Johnny (David Otunga, Mark Henry, Drew McIntye, The Miz, Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger) vs Team Teddy (Santino Marella, Zack Ryder, Kofi Kingston, R-Truth, The Great Khali and Booker T) winner becomes GM of both Raw and Smackdown

First of all, I appreciate the fact that everyone in this match up (more or less) has a logical reason for participating. A great shout with the addition of D-Mac and actually showing some continuity in the booking, with McIntrye harkening back to when he was embarrassing Teddy on a weekly basis last year in a recent interview. WWE has focussed a lot of energy on this match in recent weeks and deservedly so, especially considering the contest will decide the fate of the WWE. Sure, there are those that will complain about some of the participants being chosen over others and that the match is just a way of trying to fit as many superstars left off the card as possible into doing something. However from my vantage point, creative has succeeded in drumming up enough interest in what should be a nice undercard match. Of course, it all depends on the execution of the match and it does have the potential to be a complete clusterfuck, much like the 2-minute 8-man tag match at last year’s event. Let’s hope it doesn’t end up that way.

I’m expecting a win for Team Johnny. It’s been proven time and time again that a heel GM/Authority figure always works better than a face one. Sure, Teddy Long serves his purpose as a happy go lucky all round nice guy but John Lauranitis is able to garner a decent amount of heat. Reigning over both Raw and Smackdown will only bring him some more. Honestly, I don’t think the move would be permanent anyway, unless WWE decides it is time to officially end the brand split.

Winners: Team Johnny

Cody Rhodes (c) vs The Big Show for the Intercontinental Championship

The blooper packages that have aired as the build for this Wrestlemania showdown have been entertaining and the WWE have allowed Cody Rhodes to show some diversity by morphing from comedic mockery one minute, to vicious beat downs the next. However, this feud has been so lopsided in favour of Cody Rhodes that wrestling logic 101 dictates that The Big Show will walk out of Miami with the Intercontinental Championship. Indeed, I think that’s what will happen. Show has had his fair share of humiliations at Wrestlemania and I think the WWE will reward him for the past experimental matches they conducted with him as well as his recent seconds long World Title reign embarrassment. In fact, a win for Show would make sense. Rhodes has pretty much done nothing with the title since bringing back the old school white version and I think it’s time that both he and the title move on. As for the match, I expect a decent outing from the two. Rhodes has proved he can deliver a good match and Show has a habit of delivering when called upon. Everyone will be out to steal the show from the main events, I expect this to be no different.

Winner and NEW Intercontinental Champion: The Big Show

Kelly Kelly & Maria Menounos vs Beth Phoenix & Eve

Well, how WWE missed the boat with the diva’s for Wrestlemania. The ‘Diva’s of Doom’ alliance between Beth and Natalya fizzled out before one of them had the chance to turn on the other. A Beth Phoenix vs Natalya match would have been a great addition to an already stacked card. As for a Beth Phoenix vs Kharma match, maybe we’ll get that next year. With Kharma’s stillborn pregnancy, no one could have expected her to be in an emotionally stable place to be on the road to Wrestlemania. Her outing at the Royal Rumble was more than enough.

The WWE opted instead to attempt to get mainstream media attention from Maria Menounos, the "Extra" host, appearing in a match. We’ve seen Maria Menounos wrestle for the WWE a couple of times before and for the minimal amount of training she will have received, she proved herself to be naturally athletic. In terms of the amount of training she has compared with the likes of Kelly Kelly, she’s probably a better worker than Princess Bimboid… But I digress. K2 vs Eve looks a dead cert following Wrestlemania and I imagine WWE will delay on that this Sunday by putting the celebrity over.

Winners: Kelly Kelly & Maria Menounos

Randy Orton vs Kane

Probably the match that feels most ‘thrown together,’ Orton vs Kane hasn’t really peaked my interest like many of the other matches on the card. The feud has seemingly consisted of Kane’s initial attack on Orton followed by a series of RKO’s delivered on Kane. Pretty poor execution in my opinion. That’s not to say the match quality won’t be good, as Orton has really upped his game in the past year and Kane is always a reliable worker.

Both men have the potential to walk away as the winner. While Kane’s return to his masked persona hasn’t been great, one feels that if the WWE are serious about re-building Kane into the demonic monster he once was then he needs a big victory. What better way than to vanquish Orton at Wrestlemania? Alas, WWE loves them some Super Orton and I think that tips the scales in favour of the viper.

Winner: Randy Orton

Daniel Bryan (c) vs Sheamus for the World Heavyweight Championship

Daniel Bryan’s progression since winning the World Heavyweight Championship has been nothing short of exceptional. The way his character has developed into a smarmy, nefarious straight up bastard has been the highlight of Smackdown over the past couple of months. His manipulation of AJ is relatable to anyone who has seen that happen in their own lives and just makes you want to hate him that much more.

Sheamus has been on an unbelievable winning streak as of late. Since winning the Royal Rumble he has dominated everybody he’s been in the ring with. However, it’s interesting to note that the past four Rumble winners have been defeated in their subsequent match at Wrestlemania.

I think it’s a damn shame that there was been no mention of the fact that they were bumped off last year’s card and are now main eventing it. That was an important plot point missed and it should’ve been inserted somewhere, if only as a part of one promo and never mentioned again. It’s the greatest crux their storyline could possibly have.

I will say that I think AJ will be the cause of Bryan’s downfall…eventually. As far as ‘Mania is concerned, I think Bryan uses some dastardly heel tactics to once again escape with the title. Or maybe that’s what I’d like to believe. It’s obvious the WWE has wanted to push Sheamus to stars since his arrival and I could just as easily see Sheamus picking up the victory for his first face title run. For the sake of predictions however, lets go with Bryan. I just hope they’re given a nice amount of time to work with. YES! YES! YES!

Winner and STILL World Heavyweight Champion: Daniel Bryan

CM Punk (c) vs Chris Jericho for the WWE Championship

Now here’s the match I’m looking forward to the most. Not because it features my favourite active wrestler (Y2J) but because it has the potential to be a fantastic technical spectacle. Each man does have a legitimate claim for the best in the world crown. While the feud has become more and more heated because of the facts that Jericho has revealed about Punk’s family. It’s been entertaining to watch. I do think it’s a bit of a shame that they haven’t had more time to go back and forth on the mic with one another but whatever.

I do think that CM Punk is winning here. Internet rumours have been swirling round that Jericho will be leaving once again to go on tour with Fozzy, whether they’re true or not will become apparent following Wrestlemania. There are no tour dates listed on Fozzy’s website, so take that for what you will. However, knowing the Internet the so-cal tour will be Download festival which they ARE playing. A HUGE weekend tour…yeah. I just think Wrestlemania will be an opportunity for Jericho to put the younger Punk over. A passing of the best in the world torch, if you will.

Winner and STILL WWE Champion: CM Punk

Triple H vs The Undertaker in a Hell In A Cell match w/ Shawn Michaels as the special referee

The Undertaker is synonymous with winning at Wrestlemania but to the WWE’s credit they’ve found ways over the last few years to build just a little doubt in the minds of the audience.

It has to be said, the build has been a little uninteresting at times, with each man essentially saying the same thing over and over again. However, little nuances in the storytelling have helped it survive. Shawn Michaels smirk after the Undertaker called him the better wrestler, HHH’s unwillingness to end the streak as Taker has become a brand to him now and strain placed upon the friendship between HBK and HHH has produced some excellent melodramatic moments.

As for the match, there’s no doubt in my mind that Undertaker is going to win, it’s just a matter of how? Will he overcome an onslaught from both Shawn Michaels and Triple H? Will Michaels turn on Triple H and set up a match for Wrestlemania 29? As adamant as Shawn is regarding his retirement being permanent, I’m predicting that Michaels costs Triple H after much violence, sweat and BLOOD. Yep, a bonus prediction right there. There will be blood!

Winner: The Undertaker

John Cena vs The Rock

It’s been called a lot of things. Once in a lifetime. The biggest match in Wrestlemania history. While I am excited for the match, especially the crowd reaction, some of the build up has been a giant waste of time. As a fan of John Cena and someone who grew up with The Rock, I’m afraid to say that nearly all of that wasted time and shitty build up has come from The Rock. From a 4-hour promotional package called Wrestlemania 27 last year, to tired catchphrases, notes on a wrist, what’s trending on Twitter, muffled lines and choking, The Rock has been owned by John Cena almost every week.

If WWE have The Rock win at Wrestlemania then the staff must be comprised of drunks. At the core of the feud is the fact that John Cena is performing day in and day out for the company while The Rock is a part time performer. If John Cena does not go over The Rock then it is akin to the WWE flushing the past eight years down the toilet. Fuck you John Cena, the attitude era was better, type deal. The Rock HAS to put over John Cena because Cena is going to be there the next 5-7 years carrying the company, whereas Rocky will swan off back to Hollywood. Make the right call WWE. Expect an ‘epic’ match with multiple near falls and finisher’s being kicked out of.

Winner: John Cena

So there we have it, Wrestlemania 28 predicted. Come back on Monday for a full review.

Thanks for reading.

WWE Elimination Chamber 2012 Review and Thoughts

Elimination Chamber is that little awkward spot between the Royal Rumble and Wrestlemania. For my money, the Rumble and Mania are always the two events I anticipate the most and thus the Chamber PPV goes a little un-noticed. It takes place 6 weeks before the Granddaddy of them all and is usually a place to develop or help further along existing feuds for Wrestlemania, which sometimes results in a disappointing event. Was this the case in 2012? Lets take a look!

Elimination Chamber match for the WWE Championship featuring – CM Punk (C), Kofi Kingston, Dolph Ziggler, R-Truth, The Miz and Chris Jericho

While I thought this match should have been the main event (the PPV is called Elimination Chamber after all) it served as the 'hot opener' and did so in unrelenting fashion. The Raw Chamber match had solid star power in comparison to the Smackdown counterpart and each unique superstar was utilised to maximise the amount of action that occurred throughout the match. Kofi Kingston and CM Punk kicked things off with some nice back and forth trading of pinfalls. The chamber structure allowed Kofi Kingston to shine and execute some nice variations to his high flying arsenal. R Truth took part for a brief moment and was the first to be eliminated after a quick flurry of offense. Dolph Ziggler bumped like a champion and had an opportunity to 'show off' by implementing the chamber into his shtick. The Miz, who has been floundering for weeks with his promo's and in ring technique, took a step on the road to redemption with a strong and convincing showing in the chamber match. Of course the big story is between CM Punk and Chris Jericho. When the two squared off, the crowd popped in anticipation of the two finally going one on one. However, WWE are saving this one till Wrestlemania as Punk eliminated Jericho in controversial fashion. A knockout kick sent Jericho tumbling to the floor, into a camera man and some sort of box, rendering him unable to compete. This was a nice way of getting Jericho out of the match and means that Punk doesn't hold a clean victory over Jericho heading into Wrestlemania. It is also a source of frustration for Jericho as he never lost the match and can be held over Punks head as a feud between the two heats up. A really good action packed chamber match.

****

Winner and STILL WWE Champion – CM Punk
 

Beth Phoenix (C) vs Tamina Snuka for the Divas Championship

Without a doubt, the playing up of Tamina as the daughter of Jimmy Snuka and the perception that she has become a legitimate threat in recent weeks helped this match. Hell, the fact that Kelly Kelly, Eve, Alicia Fox or The Bella Twins weren't involved helped this match. While not the greatest women's match ever, it was certainly better than any recent Divas ppv bout. Honestly, a decent match and the story of Beth avoiding Tamina's big blockbuster finish time after time before actually kicking out of the Superfly Splash was a nice touch. Sweet Dragon Sleeper by Phoenix too. I don't know where we go from here with the divas division because we've got to be getting Kharma vs Beth Phoenix at Wrestlemania. That's the best thing that can happen right now. Won't that render all this build for Tamina pointless though?

*3/4

Winner and STILL Divas Champion – Beth Phoenix

Elimination Chamber match for the World Heavyweight Championship featuring – The Big Show, Wade Barrett, Cody Rhodes, Santino Marella, The Great Khali and Daniel Bryan (C)

Again, a really entertaining chamber match. The star power wasn’t as strong as the Raw chamber, but everyone involved made the absolute best of the situation and delivered a thoroughly enjoyable story. The Big Show looked like the monster he is and the ongoing feud with Daniel Bryan was furthered in the chamber. The unique moment went Show broke into Bryan’s pod from the top was a nice touch. Speaking of Bryan, he took some nasty looking bumps. Going through the (what Michael Cole was all too eager to tell us) ‘bullet proof’ Lexan, the powerbomb into the chamber and the door being rammed shut on his neck were particular highlights. The real star of the match, however, was someone no one even considered to be anywhere near the Elimination Chamber PPV, never mind a chamber match in itself. I have to give credit where its due and Santino was booked to look like an absolute fighter last night. Gone was the comedy jobber and instead we saw an underdog who absolutely refused to give up, despite being beaten down time after time. Sure, it’s a classic story but its classic for a reason… it works. The crowd were molten crazy for Santino the entire time match and reached fever pitch following his pinfall eliminations of both Cody Rhodes and Wade Barrett. The final moments between Daniel Bryan and Santino are worth a re-watch. When Santino hit the Cobra on Daniel Bryan EVERYONE thought the impossible had been achieved. Moments later when Santino temporarily broke the Lebell Lock, that same thought crossed peoples minds once again. Eventually Santino tapped and Daniel Bryan heads to Wrestlemania as World Heavyweight Champion. Sit back and think a minute, though. A superstar who has become nothing more than a comedy jobber was booked to eliminate two men who are considered the future of the company. On top of that, Santino was one of the last two survivors and almost fought out of a deadly submission. That’s quite the push. Judging by crowd reaction last night, WWE would be foolish not to capitalise on Santino as he proved he could hang with upper level talent.

As for the post match, if this was indeed WWE signalling Sheamus vs Daniel Bryan is happening at Wrestlemania, I’d more than welcome it. A match between the two was bumped off last years card, this year they’d be co-headlining for the World Heavyweight Championship. Quite the story.

*** ¾

Winner and STILL World Heavyweight Champion – Daniel Bryan

Jack Swagger (C) vs Justin Gabriel for the United States Championship

A throwaway match. Honestly, what is with not advertising matches anymore? Swagger and Gabriel are currently struggling to get on Raw and Smackdown and the United States Championship has once again become worthless. A three minute match has no business being on a Pay Per View.

½ a *

Winner and STILL United States Champion – Jack Swagger

John Cena vs Kane in an Ambulance Match

Apparently, WWE feels the need to cheapen their ‘Elimination Chamber’ PPV by having anything but a Chamber match as the main event. Honestly, when the feud started I was all for it. Cena and Kane had never really had a high profile one on one feud and there was a refreshing feeling about the whole thing. The fact that Kane was once again donning his mask was a bonus. However, WWE felt the need to turn one of their fastest rising stars in Zack Ryder into a human punching bag. Ryder has been saddled with a romance storyline with Eve and been made to look like a complete idiot. Racking up approximately 500 injuries in the process. I can’t help but feel WWE is playing a sick joke on Ryder. They’re sending the message that if they didn’t make him, he isn’t going to be the star he could potentially be. Ryder's involvement initially added something to the story, but has since become more comedic than anything else. Meh. Anyway, the match. It was a rather timid affair but one can blame that on the nature of a PG environment on a hardcore style match. There was no doubt who was going to win heading into Wrestlemania but, both men went out there, hit a few impact moves, told their story and ended it. Cena was never going to take part in anything too brutal considering the risk of injury and the disastrous consequences that would have for the yearlong hyped match with The Rock.

I’m still hoping Zack Ryder gets his Wrestlemania moment in a one on one match with Kane, hopefully minus half a storm trooper outfit.

** ½

Winner – John Cena

So there we have it, two very good chamber matches, a decent Divas match and an OK ambulance match. All in all, an enjoyable pay per view that looked less than friendly on paper. It also helped set up the two potential championship matches at Wrestlemania between CM Punk and Jericho and Sheamus and Daniel Bryan. Sweet. Two live shows to look forward to this week, Raw as usual and Smackdown on Tuesday night.

Thanks a lot for reading and till next time, Lets Talk Wrestling

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Thoughts on the return of Chris Jericho

The first Raw of 2012 had been hyped for weeks. Since the ‘It Begins’ videos began airing, rumours were rife as to who would be returning or debuting. Everyone from The Undertaker, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Brock Lesnar, Shane McMahon, Stephanie McMahon as well as Skip Sheffield and Brodus Clay were mentioned as possible candidates behind the hype videos. One name stuck however, that name was none other than my second all time favourite wrestler (behind HBK) Chris Jericho.

Jericho had been playing the Internet for a while, denying rumours, laughing off accusations and claiming that he’d never wrestle for WWE again. Perhaps in retrospect, Jericho overplayed it a little too far as there were a fair few fans absolutely certain that Y2J would return. Well, he did and despite what some detractors would say, he did so in genius fashion.

Firstly, I’ve seen people complain that the videos were ‘too epic’ or ‘too dark’ to be placed as a platform for the return of a Chris Jericho type character. Really? I mean, his initial debut featured a mysterious countdown clock that counted down for weeks until his famous ‘Raw is Jericho’ appearance. His second re-debut featured another puzzling series of videos that featured a code to be cracked. So when you think about it, why wouldn’t they use another series of mystifying videos for Jericho? On Y2J’s DVD (highly recommended) he says that if he was to make another debut, he would have to do something completely different and come back with a new character… this is an opportunity to do so. Think about it, before Jericho started wearing suits, talking slowly and using long, brash words, who else did it? No one, really. Now all the heels in the WWE use that formula. A character change is a necessity for Jericho.

As for the televised return, it was nothing short of genius. The crowd were pumped and popped for everything Jericho did… initially. Y2J had the Memphis crowd and the audience at home in the palm of his hand. The more and more adulation Jericho sought from the crowd, the more he got. Until, some of the cheering turned to boos and Jericho’s wry smile appeared. One of the best talkers in the business returns without saying a word and plays everyone like a fiddle. Everyone would have expected Jericho to cut some sort of amazing welcome back promo but he didn’t. He simply asked the crowd to cheer for him, chant for him and then simply walked away. Genius.

Why genius? Well, if you follow Chris Jericho on Twitter you’ll notice that he takes exception to the fact that WWE took his heel formula and copy and pasted it on to anyone and everyone on the current roster. He takes exception to people stealing his moves. However, he especially takes exception to CM Punk calling himself ‘the best in the world’ and claims Punk stole that moniker from him. Of course, this is Jericho we’re talking about and he is a master at storytelling and playing his character thus he is most likely playing the Internet with these claims. However, I think it goes deeper than that. What if his comments have been designed to set up his return all along? Think back to the videos. Phrases like ‘take back what is rightfully his’ and ‘end of the world as we know it’ stand out to me. What if these two phrases are referring to CM Punk and the moniker of ‘best in the world?’ It WILL be the end of the world as we know it, because Jericho will once again become best in the world. His return segment showed a change in the Jericho character that left the WWE in 2010 to one more reminiscent of his old ‘Y2J’ arrogant bastard character. Without saying a word, Chris Jericho managed to piss off the IWC and confuse the hell out of everyone. He effectively managed to turn heel immediately. Genius.

On top of everything else, it extends the intrigue for the videos into another week. Who is the woman that is mentioned in the videos? What is Jericho taking back? Just what the hell is going on? Additionally, viewers will tune in next week for an explanation from Jericho as well as the next chapter in the storyline. Honestly, people need to think the whole thing through before criticising it. When WWE creative get it wrong, they damn sure get it wrong. However, creative as well as Jericho got this right on the money. If it leads to Punk vs Jericho at Wrestlemania, then bring it the hell on.

Thanks for reading, assclowns.

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